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The Panda War Posted by: Mio at 01-03-2015 08:09 AM, Last Modified 08-31-2015 17:25 PM
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Once upon a furry time.
pandas lived in like china or something.
then those japanese people started doing kawaii stuff.
some of the pandas was like "sweet cool lets do that."
and some pandas were like "no we are fat."
so after some time pandas working out and times getting kawaii
the fat pandas bonded together to form this like super panda thing
and then the skinny kawaii pandas were like "oh dang this sucks."
so they used went on ebay and bought some cool german scienctists
and built a big super kawaii skinny panda robit
and then they fought and lots of pandas died.

its been 3245 years since the war started and still they fight
but now like some other furries have joined in and well stuff is frick fracked.
its all apocalypsey and stuff and everyone is dirty, with all the dust in the air and stuff.

so in comes our hero- i mean survivor panda named ... Z (dun dun dunnnnn)
So Z is like this skinny panda but was never into the war and stuff so she basically just
survived the best she could avioding all the bandit furs and etc.

so like Z is just eating some canned bamboo and then -gun shot sound effect-
after doing a sick action roll she took out her SVD (dragunov for you scrubs)
and she tottally like head shotted a bandit fur.

she jumped down from the window (only a few feet dont want to hurt yourself in the apocalyse ... furpocalypse)
she went over to the body of the canine thing and seached it
she found a note and wiped the glass on her gas mask so she could read it.

the note read
"hey you jacked my ride now your going to pay.
i got furends in high places even with the world like this.
i will have your furry little head."

after reading the note she looked back at the nearly broke down station wagon and sighed
all she needed it for was to get home jeez its not even a good car.
she then tossed the note on the body after taking the supplies it had.
looking up at the sunset and thinking of the events that have happened just now she wanted revenge
on the fur she stole the car from. kind of messed up if you think about it but whatevs.

so after like a month of like super cool sneaking missions and eating some snakes to keep her stamina up so she could heal
(might as well call her snake eater for now hehehe) yeah she found out that the furson she was looking for was
one of the leaders of the war. why the heck did he have a bad car?

so anyways now she knows by killing the furson know as Mr. Jiggles she could end this really pointless war
and everything wouldnt go back to normal but it would be cool to stop a war right?
but all she had was a name, no location, nothing else.

well shes like super resourceful and stuff so like she goes to this bar she knows of that still kinda kickin.
dirty fursons everywhere, high priced drinks, tittys.
this was surely the right place to start looking for a high ranking military leader.
so she sat down at the bar and ordered a drink which she payed with no complaining
which thru some furs off, like who the hell pays for drinks over priced and doesnt complain.
a few guys see her and think "yeah we could take her."
but after seeing her awesome tattoos and scars and equipment they were like "actually she could have aids or something nah."

so after asking around abit and a few odd looks
this one old fur was like "hey pretty tits over here"
which she responded "alright dick" they both laughed
which was good because shes not dead yet- i mean not at all ever.

"oi you askin bout dat jiggly mistah ar ye naw?" he says.
"yes" she says.
"weeehl i kod elp yea butt i be retirerd" he says.
"i need you" she says.
"alrigh i will elp ye lass" he says.
"hear take dis map wit a convieunt lil red cycle on et, das wer yah find yea target mmm lass" he says.
"thanks" she takes the map and starts to head out but stops as that guys needs to give a warning.
"i warn ye lass it be heavily garrrrded by like tons of eyely trianed black op navy seal mariiens" he says.
"how do you know of this old mang?" she says.
"as a marine i know these things mmmkay now get ye booty on dah road" he says.

with that she headed out the door and started walking in a direction
hopefully the right one like serooiusly does anyone have a direction finder thing?
you know the thing that points and magenets? ah forget it.

so anyway after like ... one,two,three ....
after like 5 months of walking looting survivng and probably a hardcore romance scene
she arrived at a compound heavily guarded by those spec ops furs.
"holy jeebus ... i went the right way hehehe" she thought to herself and no one else. (getoutofmyheadiknowyourthere)

so like after a few minutes of rasising suspition on a few guys and hiding in a box at least once
she made it to the outer wall and slipped in thru an open drain
"why dont they ever block these off its like they want me to get in" she thinks
which is exaclty what happened.
after she climbed out there was like 10 furs pointing dangerously over tactical weapons at here
one fur had a katana with dark magic jeez git gud scrub.

so they tourtured her and jiggles was all luaghing and stuff and then they thru her into a cell
"ha nows my chance!" she again thinks to her self because shes lonely on the inside (insert sad violin music)
she then throws up and then a gaurd is like "yo you ok my homie let me open this cell door and come in to phyically check on you
insted of stand outside the barred wall and watch."

obviosly she kicked his butt and disguised herself as one of them
it was really easy because all the furs were random people trained to be really good so she fit in
purrfectly. She then sneaked her way to the obvious house for the high up military people.
she sneaked around and found a vent. she crawled inside and crawled thru the vent system.
ending up above the bathroom she looked around and saw a vent opening she could get thru.
below the vent was a fur takin a poop. she pulled out her silenced desert eagle she got from the gaurd,
it was over tactical but she left the suppressor obviously, and she poped that fur right in the head.

using his dead body as a good landing pad she slipped out of the bathroom and like just blended into the lower ranking gaurds.
she eveintually slipped upstairs to higher ups area. she knew that once up there she wouldnt blend in so she sneaked around and killed all the higher up stealhly and hid their bodies. after killing the last one and hiding his body she herd someone coming in so she hid in a locker.

a tall skinny panda fur walked into the room and saw all the blood and blood trails.
after thinking for a second he said out loud for some reason "everything looks purrfectly normal here"
that was him, mr jiggles, this is it, its time, for the last kill of the day maybe.
he had slipped into his office and locked the door. the time she was thinking about killing him she let him get away, dang.

she slipped out of the locker and saw the door was locked because it had a red light on it.
"hmm i need a keycard to get in maybe one of the officers has one" she thunk.
after checking all the spots she hid the bodies there was no keycard.
"dang maybe there is another way in" she thunked again
after a minute she found a vent that led directly into his office.

she bust out the vent and pointed her desert eagle at mr. jigs.
"aha i have you now and i will kill you and end this war and also laugh at you for having a bad car hahaha" she said.
"damn! i thought i had you Z, well now that your here i will explain my whole backstory of how i played this war
and etc to gain power for my super sercert science project thing!" he said.
"whaaaat" she said".
"haha i am rebuilding the destroyed panda robit made like 3000 years ago and the project name is Metal Pan" he says.
"also i am trading blue prints to other world powers and they will make Metal Pans as well!" he continues on.
"it will be a race for world domination hahaha even if this world is kinda dead but whatever!" hes still talking.

she shoots him getting tired of him talking.
"ugh looks like i have to blow this popsicle stand" she says holding up a detonater.

"ok guys ill be back later" she says to the guards guarding the outer wall door.
"shes so nice" guard 1 says.
"yeah i dont remeber her from training maybe shes new" guard 2 says.
"thank the sun this place is building Metal Pans to restore peace to the world" guard 1 says.
"yeah more nice furs like her wil" guard 1 almost says but the entire base is blown up and everyone inside and around dies.

She sits on a hill with all her old gear on and looks at the blazing fire she created
"finally the world will be at peace"
an American flag raises behind her.

THE FIN......


Post a Comment!
Comments:
Zuulass: i wrote this
Victor: were is a11 da yiff. 210 needs more yiffz
Zuu: 100 percent
Zuu: 100
Aria Auroralïs: Totally serious... XD
Lilly: Interesting.
Deadfall: I call it a dragonov because i dont use snipers so its name never interested me QQ I tend to use melee weapons or a SMG unless I feel annoyedhostile in which case I tend to pull out a heavy weapon to let off some steam... o o I digress though I should not be considered a scrub D in fact I have no clue what a scrub is even despite its common use by those annoying constantly talking guy gamers who use the crappy OPed weaponry and camping to win games
Zuu: still a great read
Zuu: good
Victor: I think I contracted cancer from reading this
Jessi: ...sequel?

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